My heart is bleeding

The specialist told us that they are giving her medication. But people who suffer from heart attack will still have the risk of having heart deteriorate even with medication. These few days are crucial for her as her heart is very fragile. Her heart is montiored by icu. Anyway, we are told to prepare for the worst because there is no way for her to go thru operation due to her age.

My heart is bleeding...Too painful to bear!!

Do not take her away from me!!!

Two missed calls from my cousin during my PMP lesson today. It was 3.00 p.m and my sense told me something has happened. I hate to receive my cousin's phone call out of the blue. True enough, my angel grandma was in A&E when I returned her call. Luckily, my class ended early at about 3.30 p.m and rushed my journey to Changi General Hospital..

She was in A&E for 4 hrs. Doctor was trying to slower her heart beat as the hypertension will cause her to get stroke. Our eyes were red while waiting because doctor has told us to prepare mentally. At about 6 pm, all cousins, nieces and nephews had arrived. That's the time when grandma had stablised and warded, but she is just as weak.

At her age of 92, I think she will leave us anytime this year. She has been a strong lady. A perfect person with perfect eye sight, kind, gentle and loving soul. We shower her with our love heartedly and vice verus, she has given us the same. The closest person deep in our heart, we all know and of course, we pray she can get well soon.

What will happen to me if she left? What will happen to the entire family if she left? That's the scariest moment and I bet it gonna be the worst day in my life. Well, having said that, I definitely have no courage to face it.

Looking at her pale face, her weak breathing, our hearts have melted. When she held my hand, my tears just dropped. Ma ma, do not leave us so sudden, please. You have made our life wonderful and beautiful. I have the best grandma in this world. Ah gong, if you are there to wait for ma ma, can you tell god not to have her with you so soon? The selfish me would like her to stay longer so that she can attend my wedding ceremony and thats the last thing i wanna ask for and do it for her..please, please...

Ma ma, if you could bring me to life when I was primary 5, the year which I nearly died due to appendix explosion. I hope the love I have in you can bring you eternity living. Lets fight together for our future, ok?? Promise me

Before and After

Have learnt a new skill today. Hee hee..so happy.. I am going to learn a new stuff everyday so that I can finally create a montage myself.

Look out for the eye bag. Before and After..

Before:-


After:-

Who is at fault?

This is scary. I have just finished the blog of May (http://pinkmayflower.multiply.com/journal/item/140), the girl who died due to overwork in HP.

Whose fault is that? Her fault to overlook her health, HP fault to overlook the welfare of their staff or the society fault? Many arguments, many views. Which is right?

Health
======
Everyone should be responsible for their own health. If you do not love your body and take care of it, who else can do it for you. If you could not take care of yourself, who else can you take care of. It is a chicken and egg thingy. Do you think that the company will take pathetic of you and let you go on leave or break with many deadlines to meet. However, I do understand that in situation whereby the person is committed and responsible to his work, he will tend to neglect his own health in one way or the other.

Company
=======
I am an ex-HP staff too. It is indeed not easy to survive in HP due to the needs to multitask tonnes of work, the needs to have meeting even after office hour and sometimes up to early morning. Because of these, you could hardly catch some sleep and rest. Colleagues are basically glued to their laptop working around the clock even on weekend. Because of this, HP implemented flexible working hours allowing staff to work from home.

Some who do not work in HP also feel that we have the luxury to work from home or come to office late, but do they know the effort and sacrifice we have made to enjoy this. Sometimes working from home can be worst than working in the office because oftenly you will skip lunch and time chit chatting with colleagues in the office. I still remembered once that I had meeting every night for almost a year being a UAT lead. There was hell!! Come to think of it now, I am very certain that I do not want to go back to such life again. NEVER!! I feel much better without any nights meeting now.

Pros and Cons. Colleagues were nice there and bosses were opened to feedback as well. Very open culture but work kill big time.

Society
=======
Lots of things to talk about Society today. Everyone should know why money is so important today. In Singapore, to own a car, a house, etc are so so expensive. Everything is going up but very often, salary stays stagnant or we have to really work extremely hard to see a bit of money coming in. Very difficult to survive ya. M The best thing is the way the culture runs in Singapore. We usually given tonnes of work to do and it basically the job of two person instead of one. In this case, your boss will tell you that these are needed to support your promotion, etc. Many usual statements provided by those bosses. I can even memorise and know what they are going to say next so I could not be bother to comment. Many many more about this society that drives its nation to suffer.

Medical Checkup

If i remembered correctly, it was my third medical checkup for the year. The first ones was with my family clinic. That checkup was altrasound on my kidneys, bladder, womb. The second checkup was with IDA. I paid $120++ for the woman package. Everything was good except my HIGH cholesterol level and low red blood cell. Me and mine Seafood again..hee hee.

The two tests have proven that I have grown taller. Now is 1.61 m which I used to be 1.60 m only. Hee hee..Dun ask me why I can be taller since age is catching up..I have no idea or is it because of my swimming session.

All about Dreams

Eh? What actually make up of dream? Every night when we go to sleep, we will spend part of the night dreaming or in the dream state. Though we may not remember anything about our dreams but we all have them.

See, I am a dreamer. I dreamt 99% of the time and I do enjoy my dreams most of time. Because I enjoy to be in my dream, I could hardly wake up to work almost everyday to work..ha ha..Is this an excuse or what?? Anyway, I really love to dream. In dreams, I could get to places which I may not have a chance to go to, be with handsome someone whom you may not have a chance to meet with or close to someone you wish to, etc..and because of it, I used to have a dream dictionary with me which I have bought. Now it is nowhere I could find..Damn..

How much do you believe in your dream? Do you always feel that something looks so familar in life which you thought you have came across in your dream..Well, I think some of you do.

Actually, I am amazed by myself. Sometimes I can wake up half way from my dream to answer my nature call. When back to my bed, I will think of what I have dreamt earlier on, if I could remember, I can naturally return back to my dream. Amazed right..I thought so too...Sometimes, I enjoy my dream so much that when i woke up, I will make story to continue and in the end, I often forgot what I have done earlier before I left home..Sigh..

Personally, I believe in dreams. I believe if you do think of a person too much, care about an incident too much, images will appear in your dream and they do reflect reality.

Here for now. Thanks for listening to my crappy stuff..heehee

Lies Beneath

Something shocking. Story begins..

Accidentally realised something happening to an overseas friend today..I was shocked to realise..What have lied beneath have finally came to lights..Is this called hiding the truth or hideous act or I could put as secretive? Fundamentally, the truth is difficult to accept but I guess she has swallowed it and accepted the truth. It has also geared her brain ease of guessing and put her love to a stop. Whether it was a good or bad news, it is up to her to assess. Hopes may have vanished in her heart. Sad news is, it has tortured her for few years but the good news is, thanks god, her path is cleared for the rest of her life and she could move on without regret finally..A phase which reads "Life is like a scam. In the end, what you really want may not be want you want..". It happens most of time and it is up to individual to accept the path and be brave to face the challenge. Do not be the weakest link.

My friend, stop looking back, if anything can be done, it would have been done long time ago. It was obvious that no effort has been delivered or sacrificed. If anything can be done to heal your wound now, that is time.

Activities

Manjong session last night was fun. Basically we have cracked jokes and laughed heartedly during the entire session. My jaws nearly dropped.

Just back from a streamboat dinner with two pretty ladies. Suppose to be ladies night, so we ate and went for a short shopping at Marina Square. Ended up buying a blue top from Zara.

Work has been busy throughout the entire weeks. Cannot stand it but what to do but to whine everyday lor..sigh :(

Next Wed is my photo shooting session. Been raining almost everyday and hope it will not affect my day else have to wait for next date..Lets pray!!

Diet Week

Monday - Went for a swim at TP.
Tuesday - Skipped Dinner. Only one meal a day
Wednesday - Meeting Collin for a swim at TP. Skipping dinner
Thursday - To do 100 sit ups. Skipping dinner
Friday - Swimming again..Skipping dinner
Saturday - Jogging
Sunday - rest day

Oh oh, my health report was out. Total cholesterol level falls within the high range. 241 mg/dL. Terrible isn't it. Me and my seafood..hee hee..

Hmm, I am planning to go for 3 weeks leaves to UK this coming July. Have informed boss and no response yet. No response mean ok or not..Well, I don't care, when time comes, i will pack and go...

Full House

This is my favorite korean drama and it comes with a nice touching song. Shall keep this and leave it in my memory.

Oh, I am crazy over this guy, "RAIN"..how I wish my boyfriend was hot like him...

Double Eyelid Surgery

Heard there are two types of methods: The stitch method and the surgical method (by laser or blade).

Got this from the website. Not sure if it is truth.

Dr Woffles charges $3k for stitch
Dr M Huang $2.5k
Dr L Kuek about $3k
Dr Chan charges begin at $2.2k for double eyelid surg.
Dr Fong's charges are definitely lower in comparison..

Have read Dr Fong's details in the website. He is also a famous doctor and he is charging reasonable price. Anyone has done some research before and which method is better. Any recommended doctor as well.

The aesthetic plastic surgeon at my clinic is Dr. Rexon is charging around $2550.

Don't ask me to go for Dr. Woffles Wu ok..Though he is the most famous ones, but I simply hate that face of his..

Life is never easy!!

GO GO, JIA YOU!!!

GO GO, JIA YOU!!!

GO GO, JIA YOU!!!

Animal Safari

Took this photo at the animal safari at SIMEI using my phone. This breed of dog is prone to eye disease and he looked moody to me. Oggy has taken a better shot of him.

Warning..

My dear, you know who you are. Warning! Please stop tagging me!! urrghhhh...:(

Layer One: On The Outside
Name : Serene Teo
Birth Date : 13 Feb 1978
Current status : Single
Eye Colour : Dark brown
Hair Colour : Brown as the base and red as highlight

Layer Two : On The Inside
Your Heritage : 100% Chinese
Your Fears : Snake
Your Weakness : Too stubborn, bad tempered, picky..So on So on..
Your Perfect Pizza : Eh, I do not like pizza leh.

Layer Three : Yesterday, Today , Tomorrow
Your Thoughts First Waking Up : Why do I need to work?
Your Bedtime : 11.30 pm
Your Most Missed Memory : Study days definitely

Layer Four : Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke : hmm, Coke I guess.
McDonald's or Burger King : Although I never like fast food, but I will choose macdonald because of its breakfast.
Single or Group Dates : Single. I hate going out in group.
Adidas or Nike : Adidas. Nike design is getting worst.
Tea or Nestea : Tea. Can help to lose weight.
Chocolate or Vanilla : Never favor sweet stuff. Nah..
Cappuccino or Coffee : Urh..I don't fancy.

Layer Five : Do You..
Smoke : Hmm, years ago..
Curse : Yeap. Anyone who mess up with me
Take a shower : Rubbish question. Of course, I take showers everyday
Have a crush : Yes
Think You've been in love : Always
Go to school : Years ago.
Want to get married : I am planning now..
Believe in yourself : No question ask. I do believe in myself. I trust no one.
Think you're a health freak : Not really, but at times.

Layer Six : In The Past Month
Drank alcohol : NOPE. I am allergic to alcohol.
Gone to the mall : Yes.
Just Been on stage : No No.
Eaten sushi : Hmm, I really cant remember
Dyed your hair : Nope

Layer Seven : Have You Ever..
Played A Stripping Game : Sorry, never strip for a game before.
Changed Who You Were To Fit In : Depends on cicumstances..

Layer Eight : Age
You'reHoping To Be Married : Before 30

Layer Nine : In a Girl/Guy
Best Eye Colour : Green
Best Hair Colour : No preference
Short Hair or Long Hair : Long hair better

Layer Ten : What Were You Doing
1 Min Ago : Writing this blog
1 Hour Ago : Writing emails
4.5 Hours Ago : Sleeping
1 Month Ago : How to remember?
1 Year Ago: I will tell you one year later what I am doing 1 year ago (which is now)

Layer Eleven : Finish The Sentence
I Love : To idle. In other word "nuah"
I Feel : stupid wasting my precious time now.
I Hate : Liar.
I Hide : my feeling most of the time.
I Need : tonnes of money.

Layer Twelve : Tag Five People, NO tag back
Dun wish to tag. Do it if you want.

The Moment

Too much surprises recently...Just saw my friend's wedding photo and realised he was married last year Oct. I thought we used to be good friends but how come the 5 of us never even know about it..Simply secretive and the reason he gave was "No banquet what! So no chance to announce to us". Eh, is that a valid reason?? Anyway, the most impt thing is as long as he is happy, we will be happy for him..

oh, I saw WenPing and his gf the other day at houseman, a coffeeshop near SGH. He called me and chat for a while. Greeted his gf and sense that she did not seem to like me..ha ha ha..ya ya, I can understand..I met her once before and at the time, she was only a friend of wenping and we went to Fusion together. That night was just a drama. He was basically dead drunk and kept asking for me. She called me for help..Guess where was I? I was at King Corpthorne having coffee with a friend and ignored him totally..Come to think about it, I was so heartless at that time thinking that his friends would help him..Well, actually he should thank me. Maybe that incident had brought them together leh..ha ha ha..the devil is calling herself an angel now..*wink *wink

Plastic Surgery

I finally took the right bus home from parkway today..So proud of myself..You know what? 70% of the time, I often took the wrong bus home..ha ha ha..I am always very sotong when taking bus..

Went for a hair cut and highlight today. This hairdresser was very interesting..I kicked off conversation like the colour of top she was wearing, plastic surgery, facial, etc and she could really talk non stop. Seem like hairdresser can earn quite a big buck huh?? She mentioned that her ex-colleagues went for breast implant, nose fixing, double eye lid surgery, etc. Her aunty is even a plastic surgeon in Canada..Hmm, why are we still working as IT profession then?? Anyway, I did enjoy the conversation with her because it is all about ladies' stuff.

Well, been thinking to go for double eye lid surgery this year..Probably around May or June I guess..Have not decide yet because I have not done much research about it..On one hand, I am also afraid of failure..Well, lets see how..

What has happened?

Tell me what has happened between http://affectionoflife.blogspot.com/ and http://www.affectionoflife.blogspot.com/. I am confuse...urrghhhh, something is not right!!

I was TAGGED

Oh no, forgot I was been tagged..Dammit..I hate it but I promised to get back..No choice

Rules: Each player of this game starts off with ten weird things or habits or little known facts about yourself. People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose five people to be tagged and list their names. No tagbacks!

Here Goes:-

*I always sleep at one side of the bed even it is a queen size or single size bed
*I must sleep with bolster else I cannot sleep well.
*I like to yawn when I don't wish to talk or answer certain question.
*I tend to bite my finger nails whenever I was in panic mood.
*I never a charitable person. I rather throw away my stuff in the rubbish chute then to donate to someone else
*I never like to ask people to buy me things. I can afford myself.
*I never like to spend men's money. I earn and pay my own.
*Dun ask me out on weekend. Weekends are my resting days.
*Dun lie to me. I can sense it and the moment I know, you are in my "blacklisted" list.
*I am vain. Dun wish to get old.

Thats all I can think of. Well...I'm suppose to pass this tag to someone. These are the people I can think of if you are reading this blog.

- Jean
- Mavis
- Jessica
- Phyllis
- Sherene

The Shock

I felt the earth moved last week..Have given me a shock..At that moment, I was working and all the sudden I felt giddy..That minute, I opened my drawer, grabbed my bag and ready to run because I thought the building was going to collapse..ha ha ha..Anyway, I left the building in a rush for lunch..Thats scary..First time in my life I experienced it..The shock remained in me for the day..

In the evening, when I was sitting in the cab and I thought of an incident. As usual, I like to day dream..Shhh, that's one of my hobbies :P. If one day we are all asked to evacuate from Singapore and you have air tickets for the entire family to fly over, what will you do to your pet?? My eyes went red at the moment and my decision is, I will stay behind to protect my dog..I am willing to exchange my life for my dog because he has his rights to live. I will never leave him behind..How about you?

Forgive and Forget

C'mon..forgive and forget, but how many times in life did people usually execute it together? To face the reality, usually we can forgive but can never forget..."Serene, I can forgive you but I never forget..." my colleague told me..ha ha..we were jokingly bringing up the incident which happened months ago..You know lah, I am very bad tempered person and happened to scold her the other day about a surprise deployment..Luckily, we admitted each other fault after which..

Same here for love..It takes minutes to fall in love but it usually takes years to forget a person..A rain drop was crying that day and another rain drop was asking what has happened. This cry baby said she was dumped. Rain drop said "You do not need to cry, if the person does not want you, it doesnt mean that you are no good. It is him who is at the loss". Do you usually tell yourself that it was a blessing in disguise after months or years??

For me? I know myself as a person whom can forgive but never can forget too especially when the hurt was deep..especially when you trust a person to hurt yourself!!!